Death Note Reloaded
by FutanariIsFail
Summary: (a repost of a fic written by a friend of mine) Jack Cool, a high school student/book reviewer, stumbles upon the Death Note and makes reluctant and sneaky use of the Death Note. Hilarity ensues.


Jack Cool, a high school student from AMERICA in Japan, finds the Death Note!  
Also being a praised book reviewer, he gives the big a bad review for it's limited storyline and vappid characters, tossing it aside for later.  
The Demon comes down to Earth asking why his Death Note got such a bad review.  
Jack reexplains why it was so bad.  
But as punishment, the demon tells Jack he is cursed to use the Death NOte, or risk giving the book to another reviewr who might give it a good review.  
Jack keeps the Death Note, desperate to keep his reputation.  
He first uses it to kill a man who had just been hit by a car and was obviously going to die anyway.  
He then uses it on a school robber who had just been shoy by the police a million times and an anvil fell on his head.  
Continuing to use this gimmick to get out of actually killing anyone, the demon becomes angered,.  
He talks to the higher demons, which are a group of piverted Japanese Anime writers,.  
They ordain him the the Death Note mach II.  
And tell him that he can ruin good plots with it.  
He writes in that Jack Cool starts to use the Death Note to kill criminals, seeing himmself as the only one who can rid the world of crime and be a god.  
Jack sees through the apparent plot changes and writes his own new Japanese name in the Death Note.  
This warpes reality and separates him from his Japanese counterpart.  
The two begin to compete with each other in an all out war.  
Jack stalks his counterpart back to a menestary that is actually a wormhole to the worl of hell.  
Housing the dreaded Anime writeres, he confronts his alter ego and the writers and eventually destroys their insepid plans and restores life to normal.  
Now a highly praised book reviewer again, he comes under the watch of Detective Gumshoe George.  
Who takes note of his killing people about to die.  
He begins a campaign to hunt down Jack and end his reign of premature killing.  
Jack slowly becomes consumed with the power of book reviewing, and finds it harder and harder to find people about to die.  
To allay this, he attempts to exploit the Death Notes vague rules section and many plot holes/.  
He tries to kill people in ways that would make contradictions, like killing someone with a magic crystal that would make them come back to life, or killing someone in a soap opera or movie theme, leaving it open that they would obviously come back in the next episode.  
But to no success.  
As Detective Gumshoes closes in, another book reveiwer, Jasmine Hudson, who was the owner of the last Death Note,  
who had written a review even more cruel than Jack's that never got published, threatens to release it.  
Working together to write the ultimate review, they pretend to work with Detective Gumshoes to track down the illustrious Death Note killear as a clever ruise.  
The three go on a wacky side quest, bring them to the criminal underworld of Mobsters called the Italian Stereotype brothers.  
Defeating them, Gumshoes is allyed of all suspicion of Jasmone and Jack.  
Four years later, Jack is now working for a professional publishing company, and has released a book, the Maany Plot Holes of Death Note.  
In doing so, he accidentally rewrites the rules of the Death Note.  
He now has the ability to not only kill people, but also cause uncomfotably hilarious situation that in no way harm the victim, but leave them rightly embarrased.  
This backfires on him when he fights a clan of gun ninjas desperate to capture the Death Note.  
One of them shoots him, but luckily, the Death Note was in his pocket and absorbed the bullet, thus ruining it's ability to cause hilarious situations, and also sending all the ninjas into a funny dance.  
At last, Jack retires from his life of reviewing and lives in a happy little home, sitting by his fireplace and smoking a pipe whilst reading the newspaper.  
the bjh But a new rival has emerged.  
AN INTERNET TROLL!  
The troll does a yotube tirade about how "Gay as shit" and "Fucking lame" Death Note is, after finding a illegally pirated video of it on Youtube.  
He becmes the next Death Note holder.  
But he only has one piece of the book left.  
He attempts to kill Jack, because he had filed a lawsuit, but is stopped, as Jack had legally changed his name to Octopus Agent.  
Jack shoots the Troll Dead, but not before the demon comes back and takes him to the other world for using the Death Note. The End. 


End file.
